November 18, 2008
I realized after logging onto my other account that I haven't updated in a while. My updates have been random and not really much to them. I've been busy busy with working and what not. Trying to get money saved up yet at the same time trying to get Christmas shopping done. I can't believe this year is almost over with. It's a relief and a shock for me. A lot has happened to me emotionally this last year. Let's recap on some things that has happened since January, shall we?Ok in January I lived up "north" meaning two hours north from where I live now. Almost in Canada but not quite there. Anyways I lived with some friends of mine. I was casually seeing this guy, mostly for the sex, but we were also really great friends. I felt that I could just talk to him about anything, and it felt good when I would wake up in his arms. I'd always go to work with a smile on my face, even in the morning when I had to drive an hour just to make it to work. It was a long commute. Soon after that, he stopped coming around. I never heard from him, he never messaged me to say hi, or call me...it was like he vanished off the face of the planet. Now I'd like to think that that did NOT hurt me, but hey, I'm human and it stung a little to realize that I was just dropped, just like that. I wouldn't have cared if we had just stopped having sex, even though it was some of the best sex I've ever had...but he just stopped being my friend complete. To this day I cannot figure out what I did to make him do that. I do know that he started to see someone else...so perhaps that's why.
I left my comfortable job at Hannafords soon after that, I couldn't take the drive any longer, and found a closer place to work at Lowes. I mean comfortable as in I knew what in hell I was doing and there wasn't much that I couldn't solve or understand when it came to the tasks at hand...the customers, some of them I could never learn to understand, but when you work in customer service, that becomes pretty mundane and boring eventually as well. I stayed at Lowes for a couple of months until I became sick with Bronchitis. They were scheduling me so that I was outside for 3 or more hours at a time in March/April...when there was still snow on the ground. And I couldn't do anything, I just had to stand out there...twiddling my thumbs, so I couldn't even move around to get warm. So I left that job.
At that point in time I had reconnected with my childhood neighbors and friends. Close enough friends that I considered them pretty much family. They offered me a place to live, a roof over my head, because there really was no point in me staying up north when the reason I had moved up there had abandoned me and left me in wonder. So I traveled back "home" where I grew up. I stayed with this family, and things were going great, I helped out around the house, played games with the kids, was pretty much a best friend to the teenager in the house. And a shoulder for the mother to cry upon because of the way her life was going. Then at camp, shit hit the fan, so to speak.
Arguments happened, people left (the mother), people stayed, I stayed, her teenage daughter stayed, we were kicked out. Got home to found my stuff was packed so I moved back in with my parents for the lack of another place to stay. And here I am. Typing away...like nothing eventful has happened to me this year. But all in all it's been a pretty shitty year. I lost one of my best friends...and I'm currently unsure if I have yet again, lost another. All do to drama, all do to complete and utter bullshit. Probably because of me being stubborn and for once in my life, sticking up for myself and for what I believe in. I think it's a lose/lose battle. Oh well.
The story shall continue...
~Charmy~